Festive Flash Fiction Day 20: Tess and the Turkey

WARNING: The tomfoolery in this post is transcendent. [I…I can’t seem to help myself…]

Also? Tough-talking private investigator Tess Trowel is back, with a final solution to The Confidential Case, and a brand new tricky task to think through!


Tess and the Turkey

“You look troubled, Tess Trowel,” Toby said.

Toby’s my tenographer. Other ‘tecs have regular stenos, but here at Tess Trowel Investigations, Toby’s a ten. And he types a treat.

“I feel tense.”

Toby teared up. “It’s the tragedy of Mr. Cane, isn’t it?”

“Finding Candy Cane hanging in that tree wasn’t terrific, Toby. And having to tidy up the tinsel? Terrible.”

Toby tissued his tears away. “Would another case take your thoughts off the trauma?”

“Totally. What’ve you got?”

Toby held up a file. “Missing turkey. Complainant is Farmer Truther.”

“A Truther turkey, eh? I’ll take it!”

On the farm, Truther looked traumatized. “It’s terrorists, I tell ya,” he trumpeted. “They’ve taken my turkey in broad daylight.”

The trail looked tepid, but I was undeterred. “This a picture of the turkey, Mister Truther?”

It was terrifying. I shifted my toothpick.

“His name is Trump,” declared the farmer, confirming my worst fears.

“Your turkey has a toupee?” I spluttered.

“No — that’s just the way he wears his wattle.”

I narrowed my eyes at Truther, taking in the traces on his trousers.

“You’re trying my patience, you twit!” I thundered. “That’s blood. Farmer Truther, I theorize you terminated your own turkey, and faked the theft to avoid taxation. Time to pay the tab for your treachery.”

Back in the office, Toby tapped the tabletop thoughtfully. “Tess, you’re a testament to tenacity. You untangle every case and come away with something tangible.”

I smacked my lips and took another bite. “That’s true.”

And in this case…?

Tasty.

***

For the month of December, my goal is to post a piece of festive flash fiction here to the blog every day. Twenty-five stories, each 250 words or fewer — a little fictional festivity to brighten the darkest month of the year. For readers, I offer these stories as a moment of peace within a hectic month of busy. And keep your eyes peeled for the odd flash of fiction from writer friends!

More soon…

~kc

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